Deadliest Catch: The Game already indicates its brilliance in the tutorial: "Main component of good catch plans", it says there. And further: "In the case of the ocean floor, crabs like most sand and mud. There are not almost all crabs on the rocks." As if I hadn't known that as a cancer fan. I even married one.

Who didn't want to be a sweeper driver, track builder or toilet maintenance specialist as a child? So I really didn't want it. But I had to play the corresponding simulators due to my job. In real life it has always been my goal to work extremely little and make a lot of money. Instead, I became a freelance writer at PC Games.

That's how I got my job as a crab fisher Deadliest Catch: The Game. It was an offer that I couldn't refuse. The leading editors pulled out all the stops to persuade me. The ladies and gentlemen promised to clap on the balcony every day. Then I can feel like a systemically important hero, who could only pay off all his debts by applause, it said. Players who like to describe themselves as hard-core and consider themselves elitists often scoff at job simulations. Most of the time they do this because they never really dealt with it. Yes, there have been a lot of pipe shredders in recent years, but the genre has blossomed.

The manufacturer describes Deadliest Catch: The Game as follows: "Enter the dangerous world of king crab fishing in the deadly Bering Sea! Take command of your own fishing vessel, use realistic equipment, combat hazardous Alaskan waters and become the world's best crab catcher!" That sounds crazy exciting. I translate as high-quality as the specialist responsible for the tutorial text did: face the risk of depression in the deadly boring Bering Sea! Never take control of your ship, get suicidal thoughts, turn crabs around for hours to find their mumu – or stare at men staring at crabs!

I'll explain that in detail later.

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You don't have to ship!
Deadliest Catch: The Game is based on a documentary series in Germany under the TV title Alaska's most dangerous job running on DMAX. Here we see what waves up to twelve meters high, arctic winds and 300 kg catchers can do if they crash against the ship's deck. Fortunately, such minor matters play no role in the simulator. Who is my age, the organ teacher in my childhood was a T-Rex, welcomes it not to suffer from an infarction.

The game depicts the catch and the technology behind it with a crane, winch, etc. in an authentic and complex manner. "If you are not sure of a certain game mechanism, you can always check guides. In the manual on the left, the bookmarks are main game mechanism description."

As a captain, I can ship to the Bering Sea myself, but I don't have to. The enterprise commemorative teleport function turns out to be faster and more effective anyway. You can also give the cutter a name. I called my Kahn Oli.

Kahn Oli sails into the Bering Sea during a romantic sunset. & nbsp; (1)

Kahn Oli sails into the Bering Sea during a romantic sunset. (1)

Source: PC Games

The developers have implemented the sorting of the crabs particularly realistically. It is not only possible to turn the crustaceans left and right, but also from top to bottom !!!!! The player analyzes size and gender. Females can be recognized by the broad belly plate, males by a narrow, triangular one. Cancer diagnosis is not only a lot of fun, it is also done quickly. I managed ten animals in 60 minutes.

Staring at up to 500 crabs for hours not only excites veterinarians, animal filmmakers, biologists and spider phobics, it also evokes memories of the face huggers from the Alien-Film and even whiten the teeth. Sorting takes place because both small and female animals come back into the sea. With these I make a pile on the left during the assessment. The big male crabs land on the right. Cinderella fairy-tale folks know what ecstatic joy such a potty-crab game unfolds.

Fischerman's Friends
If you want to let the boss hang out, hire up to four employees. Allocated accordingly, they do all the time-consuming tasks at best. I then stare at men who stare at crabs and only do the small things: puree fish to bait, wait for baskets and machines and store crabs or throw them overboard.

Otherwise, I let my infantry maloch, watch and work on my bucking list in real life. For example, I completed a degree in mechanical engineering, did my doctorate on the occasion, knitted a Maybach Exelero from vicuna wool and occasionally played around with it.

Nothing with voice output: Tinky-Winky, Dipsy, Laa-Laa and Po are finally holding their faces. & Nbsp; & nbsp;

Nothing with voice output: Finally Tinky-Winky, Dipsy, Laa-Laa and Po shut up.

Source: PC Games

Speaking of ungulates: By the way, dear children, did you know that cow antelopes are considered slow and very forgetful? This is why it happens that they flee from a lion, but suddenly they no longer know why they started running, and then the big cat eats them. All of this also applies to the employees, only without the lion business.

But notice, you notorious grumblers: When my Ratiopharm quadruplets show off the intelligence of a Japanese cucumber again, I am delighted. I sit down at my organ to sing "Hallelujah" in the version by Leonard Cohen. It blissful to reprimand subjects. If I, as a big-headed smartass, showed them the next step, the men would go on. Mostly. All in all, of course, this requires a bit of sea effort.

Before the Corana crisis, this safety margin was still in order. & nbsp;

Before the Corana crisis, this safety margin was still in order.

Source: PC Games

Sometimes I throw crabs at my slaves. That doesn't work, but it feeds my lower instincts. That Deadliest Catch: The Game crashes regularly only makes the simulator even more exciting. In combination with the occasionally shot storage stands, the title becomes a kind of Permadeath Soulslike.

In addition, the impressive bow waves should not go unmentioned. So the bow waves, not the bow waves. How do I best explain this? Ha, now I have it: In addition, the bugs that regularly hit the player like waves should not go unmentioned. I always have the case that the grass catchers hang around unreachably under the ship or are empty when they are taken out. That strengthens my personal development as a man who doesn't cry with every shit.

One-armed professional piano players who like to stand in tubs always give their all. & Nbsp; & nbsp;

One-armed professional piano players who like to stand in tubs always give their all.

Source: PC Games

Sehnot in the crab boat
Furthermore, the creators have programmed in an exemplary manner with regard to possible lack of motivation: the alter ego cannot jump, which makes virtual suicides impossible. If you save little and rarely use the time-lapse function, you will significantly minimize the number of crashes. Let this be an elite Sup3r-Pr0-Sk1ll3r like I said! When it comes to graphics, I immediately find the word useful. Only clipping errors could cause wrongful damage.

Bad people could Deadliest Catch: The Game now described as unique in that it combines the two most important features of the simulator genre in a way never seen before, that is, incredibly boring and at the same time is record-breaking. Of course, experts come to a positive judgment:

<img src = "" alt = "Little Torben-Hendrik would like to be picked up from the ball pit please!

& nbsp;”/>

Little Torben-Hendrik would like to be picked up from the ball pit!

Source: PC Games

Apart from game-related bugs and graphic bugs, apart from suicidal saves and quickly repeating activities that redefine the term "grinding", apart from ship upgrades and skill trees, the most important of which were unlocked after the first fishing season, given one low-content campaign and a single ship model that the player neither has to nor wants to control, despite the lack of multiplayer – at least one co-op version would have been necessary – and apart from the sometimes perpetual loading times that even Godot does not want to wait, given a fiddly control, never tiring and silent hollow body NPCs, aside from that Deadliest Catch: The Game an all-round successful title.

Please read the previous sentence out loud as a piece of homework, dear children, then you can later make a career as an apnea diver and do not have to become a journalist.

We come to the happy ending: for me it is Deadliest Catch: The Game A must for anyone who loves boat games and likes to chauffeur animals. It is by far the best king crab fishing simulator that I know and also achieves almost the same quality as the classic without any ifs and buts Autobahn Police Simulator 2. Hugh, I spoke!

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