On the live servers after a look into their own inventory is usually dead pants: Your equipment looks noble, but makes nothing but nice to shine. As you lean against the tavern counter in epic glittering purple like a sullenly flashing Christmas tree, staring at the enormous numbers in your equipment screen, you wonder if that's all. Especially the pieces of jewelry that dangle on your belt, only called out annoyed eye rolls.
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The highest of feelings is a click ability that temporarily increases your damage – great, yet another unnecessary move that you can incorporate into your rotation. Frustrated, take a look at the Classic server and shake your head in disbelief after a few seconds. Why are the players smiling there? Is not everything harder and slower in classic Azeroth? You look attentively at the goings-on and pinch your eyes suspiciously. Why did the warrior shoot the rogue with a fireball? And why does the rogue raging through the woods with a fan club of leather-clad night elves? And how, to the twirling Nether, has the magician gotten a damned pirate cannon with which he is barring a poor priest ?! After a sober look at your legendary boring gear, throw out your clothes and jump into the exciting life of the Classic servers. Maybe high values are not everything.
Okay, the situation on the live servers is not that bad, because after all we have our toy box there. So if you just want to fool around, you'll probably be happy with his level 120 character. However, the trinket situation does indeed look bleak: instead of pampering us with explosions, rainbows and greasy effects, trinkets today are stinking – which certainly has something to do with the fact that all the cool stuff has been banished into the toy box. But we do not want pieces of jewelery to do more damage or spell faster, but death-rays and flamethrowers that can be used in battle! Thanks to the Titans, we now have the Classic servers, where you can let off steam to your heart's content in terms of jewelery madness. And before you catch your breath to contradict us: We know that there is a lot of scolding here as well, which just gives the player an increase in value. But we do not care! The other trinkets are also easy to use in combat, and in many cases even better than the ability to boost their strength by three points. And let's face it, we're talking classic wow here. Do you seriously think we would not find a creative way to bring the jewelry to the last and drive our teammates to white heat? Throw away your best-in-slot jewelry and follow us into the armory of the insane Classic scientists. And watch out that you do not step on a gnome, they are all over here.
How we learned to love the bomb in WoW Classic
We think that warriors and villains in Classic-WoW deserve a little love, after all, they are the only two classes that are not allowed to do magic. And no, hunters do not count, because they also use mana in Classic WoW. So how could we give our battered normalos a little help? Quite simply, by giving them the ability to shoot with lasers, hurricanes, and other elemental superpowers!
Goblin Dragon Killer: Engineers were known to build small packages of joy, love, and highly flammable rocket fuel before they were demoted to a mount machine on the live servers. The Goblin Dragon Killer is a level 240 engineering recipe that is quite easy to manufacture. Your reward is a piece of jewelry that you can ignite every five minutes in the truest sense of the word. Your character will then take a "magic pose" and shoot a ten-second burst of flame from his hand, dealing up to seven hundred damage. The catch on the matter? The flamethrower's tank is leaking, which can cause you to catch fire and run in circles like a screeching rounder.
Now it's getting amusing: The moment you catch fire, you lose control of your character and you take damage – but any enemy players or mobs you touch meanwhile catch fire as well. In addition, a malfunction does not count as an "application", so you can fire your flamethrower immediately afterwards. Imagine a sadistic rogue sneaking up beside a group of enemy players and combining a Flamethrower's application with a goblin mine thrown after them. As a small bonus, your character will even continue his automatic attacks during Flamethrower animation. Get your "definitely a flamethrower" today – Elon Musk will turn green with envy!
Gnome Death Ray: Even more chaos than the flamethrower is evoked by the Gnome Death Ray, as it is sometimes rather confusing for your counterpart when your deadlust warrior suddenly shoots glaring flashes out of his crotch and sets the enemy lifebelt at bay with one blow. No joke. Prepare yourself, because the Classic Death Ray is, without exaggeration, one of the most glorious pieces of jewelery of all time.
To build your own little Death Star, you, as a Gnome Engineer, need a proficiency level of 240 and a burning urge to over-age Azeroth with death and destruction. Your hand-held Ion Cannon works by pulling the trigger and removing some of your life energy for four seconds. Withdrawal fluctuates greatly, but can reach as high as fifteen hundred health points, so keep an eye on your lifeblood. After four seconds, hell breaks in on your poor enemy: The damage of the death ray varies between seven and three thousand points, not including critical hits, because then the thing reaches damage numbers of more than seven thousand (7,000!) Points! That's enough to break down an enormous amount of enemies into their atoms with a single blow and also clear a medium-sized forest behind your enemy. Oh, your enemy wants to run away? Too bad, because the death ray has an infinite range. As long as the enemy was within your reach when you started channeling, he will hit as well. Guaranteed. Because it causes direct physical damage, it can neither be blocked nor reduced by resistance. And best of all, the Gnome Death Ray is ready for action every five minutes. We wish you amusing PvP battles! Remember to send us the angry private news of your disintegrated enemies.
Six Demon Bag: You are not a magician, but still want to cover your enemies with "the power of the wind, the fire and all such things"? No problem, the six-pocket is your friend! What exactly makes the bag? Now the six-pack pocket has not just a single feature, but a whole host of malicious tricks.
First, we present the fireball and the frostbolt: The commercial magic spells are suddenly much more spectacular when they are shot by a priest or a warrior; You can also pull a chain lightning bolt out of the lucky bag that skips over to three targets. That's all nice, but quite ordinary. So it's good that you can turn your opponent spontaneously into a sheep – without the usual regeneration of life energy! There is also a hurricane hiding in your pocket that completely immobilizes your target for three seconds. The sixth and most amusing effect, however, is the ability to summon a demon. There's nothing like the frantic response of an enemy who thinks he is fighting a single warrior and suddenly has a manafressing devil hunter hanging on his leg – or sees a full-blown beast of hell break out of the bushes in the middle of the forest of Elwynn. Back then, the charge of using "hacks" was not long in coming. We are curious how the reactions on the Classic servers will turn out.
Together you are less alone in Classic
Not a buck, lonely and alone through Azeroth to pull? We have the solution for you: bring along your own fan club, which also helps in battle and makes big eyes with PvP opponents!
Barov workers Rufer: You know the situation determined: Just now you want to enjoy the tea from the colonies, there is a bunch of rabble rotting in front of your city palace together. You adjust your monocle and rush one group of peasants to another as you sip your tea. Is not it nice when the mob is unmatched? If you've always wanted to feel like a lord or a lady, who can fling the lower layers onto their enemies with a wave of your hand, we strongly recommend that you try the Barov Raider.
You will receive the small bells through the quest "The Last Barov" in the Eastern Plaguelands. When you ring, three workers appear, made up of the peoples of your faction, all dressed in brown leather. Unlike what is described on the item, these farmers do not engage in "cleaning and cooking" … rather, they use their fists to flatten everything that does not fall on their knees in front of you! No matter which destination you point to, the three of them throw themselves at it with their arms flailing. This is not only practical if you have overestimated yourself again in the PvE, because the farmers draw a tremendous amount of aggro – especially in PvP you will have a lot of fun with your thugs. The hectic reactions of your enemy are always amusing to look at, because after all, one is not often attacked by a gang of leather night elves or biker gnomes.
It gets really amusing on PvP servers, where your summoned raid squad attacks enemy players in Booty Bay, for example, without the goblin guards intervening. Lean back, sip your tea and enjoy the spectacle. Should your counterpart defend themselves, the guards immediately rush on him to protect the rich guy with his peasant army – as in real life! The icing on the cake is that your whipping peasants attack their target until it's dead, the peasants are defeated, or the summoning time runs out. Yeah, that means the guys also get stunners out of stealth who have disguised themselves with dazzling powder.
Cannonball Runner: Your little gnome priest is bullied by a Tauren warrior? What if you could just shoot the glowing, twenty-pound cannonball into her fat face instead of sacred light and shadow? Just take Gunner Willey in Stratholme to the chest until he drops the Cannonball Runner, and off you go. And yes, that thing does exactly what it sounds like: for ten seconds, you summon a cannon that attacks the enemy. The damage is more than respectable. We guarantee that you will cause a bit of chaos in PvP when your opponent suddenly asks where the flaming explosive bullets come from, which have just blown up a third of his lifebelt. Oh, did we mention that the cannon attack ALL enemies in front of you? And that their shots ignore the enemy's armor? If you've always wanted to use an armor piercing linear accelerator in Classic WoW – here's your chance.
If you want to declare an absolute state of war, we strongly recommend that you combine the Barov Rifleman with the Cannonball Runner so that you can proclaim World War III every ten minutes. There's nothing like two clicks you can use to decide almost any fight in the open world for you. A big bunch of enemies? Send the infantry and call for artillery support! An opposing player? Roars "Today we dine in hell" in the voice chat and overrun him with your explosive underpainted mob! You encounter an enemy PvP raid? Fire your cannonball runner and watch the Classic servers spasmodically try to escape a heart attack while your artillery bangs out more than eighty missiles over a ten second period. Absolutely glorious.
Chaos is a ladder? Not correct. Chaos is Comedy. At least in Classic!
Of course, there are those of you who do not care about blazing retribution, angry mobs, and flashing death rays. Some of you are not pursuing a great goal, wealth or schema. Some of you just want to see the world burn … and we have your Classic matches here!
Orb of deception: In Classic WoW, there is no transmog and no toy box with an estimated two hundred different styles to change its appearance. What you see is what you get. With one notable exception: The deceptive ball is a random loot that is, for example, discarded with a low probability by the occultists in Scholomance. If you put on the piece of jewelry, you can become a member of the opposing faction for ten minutes. However, your name will still be displayed red to enemies and your language will not change. So what can you do with the thing, except to waste tons of gold on it? Oh, with the necessary criminal energy a lot …
Take, for example, a rogue. The stealth in Classic WoW works in your own faction so that friendly players will see you if you sneak close enough to them – but not your name. Even today, not nearly enough players know about this combination possibility, so we spread a bit of chaos: create the illusion ball, ignite it and switch to stealth mode. Now sneaks directly through a friendly player, preferably in a capital and watches as he rotates hectically around his own axis. Mages often throw spells around with surface spells, while rogues instantly switch to stealth. If you're really lucky, somebody starts, "Rogue in front of the bank!" or something similar – and chaos takes its course because other players have already seen you too. If you want to be really nasty, you use emoticons out of stealth, because even your in-game voice is transformed into that of the opposing people. And especially sadistic deceivers play a gnome villain – because they turn into a tauren when the ball is used. Maybe you'll manage to make one of your friends insane from the other guild members, because he keeps chattering about tauren villains. We wish you lots of fun with the Chaos pencils!
Gnomish concealment device: You do not feel like clothes? You want to step through Azeroth as the Earthmother made you, but when you step naked on the doorstep, your neighbors call the city watch every single time? We have the solution for you! With the gnomish concealment device, you'll never have to wear trousers again or talk to your fellow humans! Simply activate the device and you disappear in a rogue version of concealment.
First, of course, we would like to point out the wonderful possibility of combining the deceptive ball: As a warrior, disguising, transforming, frightening, and disguising you in your hiding place, your magic trick is even more effective. After all, there is no villain nearby! Other than you, of course, but you're more of a scoundrel and that's not a class, it's a character trait. Second, we point to the fact that the gnomish concealment device in the current patch is not yet considered commercial invisibility or concealment. These are terminated as soon as you start to cast a spell – unlike your device, which is deactivated only when the spell is cast! You want an example? No problem: You meet an angry warrior who wants to plunge at your magicians. You ignite the device, disappears before the eyes of the warrior and looks quite at rest with a cheerful whistle on the lips of your Pyroblast. You appear in the back of the Warrior the moment the Pyroblast strikes his life line like a D-turn. Combine the whole thing with a Hurtigkeitstrank and you arrive as a non-rogue to places that you should never reach single-handedly.
Fun, excitement and what to play
We hope you enjoyed our surprise bag of totally unbalanced and wonderfully explosive pieces of jewelry. Seriously, if you as an adventurer are faced with the choice between a gold necklace and a pretty brooch with bonus values - then we leave the room and decide on the rocket launcher. Spread chaos! Blow your friends up! Destroy your enemies with absurd trinket combinations that are as far from "balance" as the Classic WoW player numbers of which the live servers! And most importantly, never create useful but boring jewelry. See you in Classic-WoW!
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